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Does Your State Celebrate Extra Holidays?

Miranda — Mon, 26 Jul 2010 18:39:06 +0000

You know that there are federal holidays, like Christmas, New Year’s Day, Memorial Day, and Independence Day that are celebrated by giving federal employees the day off. On top of that, most state employees also get the day off, and many banks and other service providers are closed on those holidays. But many states have additional holidays.

My state, Utah, celebrates Pioneer Day on the 24th of July every year, commemorating when the Mormons first entered the Salt Lake Valley after a trek of more than 1,000 miles, by foot and by wagon, to escape religious persecution. State employees get the day off, but not federal employees (so we still get mail delivery).

As I sat there, lighting off fireworks for Pioneer Day, I began to wonder about other state holidays. Here are some of the holidays you can expect to find around the country:

Lee-Jackson Day: Virginia celebrates this day in honor of the birthdates of Robert E. Lee and “Stonewall” Jackson. The holiday is celebrated the Friday before Martin Luther King, Jr. Day. Robert E. Lee’s birthday is celebrated the day after the fourth Thursday in November in Georgia.

Confederate Heroes’ Day: Texas takes the opportunity to celebrate Civil War heroes on January 19 each year.

Lincoln’s Birthday: A few states actually celebrate Lincoln’s Birthday on February 12, rather than lumping it with Washington’s birthday for President’s Day. Illinois, predictably, is one of them, but Connecticut, New York, New Jersey and Missouri also celebrate this day. Indiana celebrates Lincoln’s birthday the day after Thanksgiving.

Mardi Gras: “Fat Tuesday” is celebrated just before Ash Wednesday in New Orleans. It’s a holiday in Louisiana, and offers a chance to party hard before Lent.

Texas Independence Day: As you probably know, Texas was its own Republic for a while. March 2 is the observed day recognizing Texan independence from Mexico. Sam Houston, also receives recognition this day.

Evacuation Day: In Suffolk County, Massachusetts, a state holiday celebrating the forced evacuation of the British from Boston is held on March 17. It marks the first major victory George Washington experienced during the Revolutionary War. Suffolk County also celebrates Bunker Hill Day on June 17.

Seward Day: Alaska likes to celebrate the Alaska Purchase treaty of 1867 on the last Monday of each March. It commemorates William H. Seward, who, as Secretary of State, negotiated the purchase of Alaska from Russia.

Cesar Chavez Day: The labor hero Cesar Chavez is immortalized in California on March 31 (or the following Monday or preceding Friday).

Patriots’ Day: In Massachusetts and Maine, Patriots’ Day is a comemmoration of the battles at Lexington and Concord. It is normally observed the third Monday in April.

San Jacinto Day: Another Texas state holiday, this day marks the day that Sam Houston led Texan troops in a surprise attack against Santa Ana in an 18-minute battle.

Confederate Memorial Day: A few Southern states still commemorate the Confederacy with special days. In Alabama, the day is the fourth Monday in April, in Georgia it is April 26, in Mississippi it’s the last Monday in April. South Carolina celebrates on May 10.

Jefferson Davis’ Birthday: Jefferson Davis is one of the most prominent Southern leaders of the Civil War, as the only President of the Confederacy. In Alabama, he is remembered on the first Monday in June. Other Southern states informally celebrate.

King Kamehameha Day: Hawaii become prosperous after this king gained control of all the islands, and his unification of Hawaii is considered one of the reasons that Western imperialism didn’t have as large an impact on Hawaiian culture as it might have had. This holiday is celebrated around June 11.

Bennington Battle Day: Vermont celebrates this patriotic holiday on August 16, remembering this battle, which was a turning point in the Revolutionary War in 1777.

Statehood Day: Hawaii celebrates its admission as the 50th state added to the United States in 1959. The third Friday in August is used to celebrate.

Family Day: Nevada makes it a point to celebrate families on the day after Thanksgiving.

Christmas Eve: Most states do not consider Christmas Eve an official holiday, and the federal government doesn’t. However, it is a holiday in Arkansas and Wisconsin. Wisconsin also designates New Year’s Eve as a holiday. Kentucky, Michigan, North Carolina and South Carolina see the day after Christmas as a state holiday.

Did I miss any? What state holidays does your state observe?

Sources: Infoplease.com and Wikipedia.com

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Does Your State Celebrate Extra Holidays?

7 Fun, Frugal Dates to Keep Your Relationship Going

Miranda — Mon, 19 Jul 2010 18:13:47 +0000

Even though we hear that the recession is over, many of us are still concerned about making frugal decisions. Plus, you never know when another economic downturn will hit (or if we will end with a double-dip recession). One of the ways that you can save money is to plan fun, frugal dates. And dating isn’t just for unmarried couples; many long-time couples will tell you that regular dates are vital to the relationship. Going out on a date is a way to spend time with your significant other, talking about common interests and remembering why you like each other in the first place.

Whether you are just getting to know someone, or whether you have been in a committed relationship for years, you can go out without breaking the bank. Here are 7 fun, frugal date ideas that can help you enjoy your time together. Make sure you leave the kids at home.

Picnic: When the weather is nice, it’s a great time to go on a picnic. Bring your lunch to the park and just sit and eat. Take your time, look about you. If there are walking trails nearby, or if there is a good, non-strenuous hike near your town, pack a picnic and go for a walk. Nature is beautiful, and you can talk while you walk, and enjoy conversation while you eat.
Gallery walks, fairs, and other community events: Find out what local events take place in your town each year. My husband and I attend Summer Fest each year, wandering through art booths and enjoying live music. There is plenty to look at, and it’s free to see what the artists have set up (just guard your wallet from large purchases). We also have a gallery walk in town, and there are a number of community events and faires. Even if an entry fee is charged (like the indoor Christmas Faire in December), it is usually quite small.
Agri-tourism: If there is a vineyard nearby, enjoy its beauty — and the often-free (or inexpensive) samples of wine. Other areas offer food tours, where you can visit strawberry fields or sample artisan cheese. When we lived in New York, going to the apple orchard for “pick your own apples” and a wagon ride was always fun. See what the locale has to offer, and then head out.
Visit the beach: There are few places more romantic than the beach. If you live near the ocean, you can head to the beach at night. Do some star-gazing and talk. If you don’t live near the beach, try a nearby lake or riverbank. As long as the light pollution isn’t bad, you can still see the stars. It’s best, though, if you can find a place a little ways out of town. I used to love walking near the river of my hometown with a date at night. It gives you time to connect, and to enjoy nature.
Learn your local history: Many towns have historic buildings, sites and other areas. Take a tour of historic monuments. Most allow ample time for you to move slowly and talk, while you learn something interesting about where you live. Bring a picnic to enjoy when you have finished your tour. If there are multiple buildings in your area, this can provide you with weeks’ worth of dates.
University events: If there is a university in your town, you can usually get access to inexpensive concerts, plays, exhibitions and other cultural events. College sporting events are often usually much less. This is a great way to get out and have a little fun without spending a great deal.
Stay in: If you can’t afford a babysitter (you could switch off with another family or start a babysitting co-op), you can still plan a date night. Plan a special “date” for after the kids go to their rooms. Send them to bed early, or at least to their rooms. Rent a movie you both want, and/or make dessert together. You could also make some popcorn and play a board game. The important thing is that you consciously make time to spend together, enjoying each other’s company. This is one relationship rule you can’t break.

Do you have some inexpensive date ideas?

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7 Fun, Frugal Dates to Keep Your Relationship Going

Celebrating America’s Independence

Miranda — Tue, 06 Jul 2010 16:21:10 +0000

This year, the Fourth of July fell on a Sunday, and the observed paid holiday was July 5. My family and I had a big barbecue and set off some fireworks at home to celebrate. We also a take a few minutes to reflect on our heritage, and our country. And take some time to read the Declaration of Independence. The Fourth of July has a long and rich history in the U.S., with most towns having celebrations and offering speeches and other patriotic displays. In honor of the Fourth of July, here are some facts about the celebration:

Origin of the Fourth of July

It seems fairly obvious that the origin of the Fourth of July was the date the Declaration of Independence was adopted. However, the Second Continental Congress actually voted to accept the Declaration on July 2. It took some time to get the signing accomplished. and the date listed on the Declaration is July 4th, so that was the day that became famous, even though the document has been approved two days previously in a closed session of the Congress — and some historians think that the real signing should have been listed as at the beginning of August in 1776. The last signer, Thomas McKean, didn’t put his name to the document until January of 1777.

As early as 1777 patriots were celebrating the signing of the Declaration of Independence. Bristol, Rhode Island has the distinction as the home of the longest continuously running celebration connected to the Declaration of Independence. Bristol’s celebrations started in 1777 with a firing of 13 gunshots at morning and again at evening, to mark the anniversary. Bristol’s “official” Fourth of July celebrations have been held each year since 1785, and the festivities run for weeks before the main parade (held July 5 this year) is held, and the Freedom Festival wraps it all up in August.

Massachusetts had the first state legislature to mark July 4 as a state holiday and celebration in 1781. Independence Day was made an unpaid holiday in 1870 for employees of the federal government. In 1938, Independence Day was changed to a paid federal holiday.

Facts About Independence Day

Independence Day is a big deal around the country. With everyone ready to celebrate and show their patriotism, it is little wonder that we spent $3 million importing flags in 2010. Here are some other tidbits about the Fourth of July:

The Erie Canal’s groundbreaking was designed to coincide with July 4th celebrations.
Thomas Jefferson and John Adams both died on July 4th, 1826. They were both signatories to the Declaration of Independence, architects of the U.S. government, and presidents.
James Monroe died on July 4th, 1831. (He was the 5th president of the U.S.)
Lewis and Clark celebrated the Fourth of July in 1805 — the first celebration to be held west of the Mississippi.
The actual signers of the Declaration of Independence were not made public until months later, for their protection. With public names, they would have been targets for British looking for traitors. Indeed, if the U.S. hadn’t gained its independence a lot of the men we honor as patriots would have hanged for treason.

Sources for this post include USHistory.org, Bristol Rhode Island’s Fourth of July Celebration, USA.gov, Wikipedia, and Home of Heroes.

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Celebrating America’s Independence

6 Ways to Simplify Your Life

Miranda — Mon, 21 Jun 2010 17:52:20 +0000

There are some days that I look around at wonder how my life got so complicated. It’s common to want to step back, take a deep breath, and live more simply. Many of us look at our hectic lives and wonder how we can back to a time when things were simpler — and maybe a little better. Simpler living has been connected to reduced stress, and increased feelings of well-being. Lower stress not only helps you feel better, but being able to relax is healthier for you as well.

If you are looking for ways to de-stress, you can start by encouraging a simpler lifestyle. Chances are that you will feel better and be healthier, too. Here are 6 ways that you can simplify your life:

1. De-Clutter Your Home

One thing you can do to help simplify your life is to get rid of the clutter in your home. A living space full of items that you don’t need, and may not even want anymore, really does affect how you feel. Plus, having all that stuff can weigh down on you, even if you aren’t planning on moving it anywhere. I’m always amazed at what a difference it makes when my home feels more open and clean. You can go slowly, or tackle all the clutter at once, but get rid of those things you don’t use or want anymore. You can sell it, donate it or give it to loved ones who need it.

2. Limit Your Family’s Activities

Extracurricular activities can be fun. It may be important to you to volunteer. But if everyone in your family has three different places to be, it starts to get ridiculous. Many of us are over-scheduled, and it becomes stressful — not to mention expensive. Evaluate where you are in life, and what activities is makes sense to do. Choose one or two things that you enjoy for now, and cut back on the rest. Limit your children to one or two extracurricular activities each term. It may force your family members to choose what the really want to focus on, but it will significantly reduce the scheduling stress in your life. And you’ll have more quality time to spend as a family.

3. Stop Buying Things

This isn’t a blanket ban on buying things. But it is a call to carefully consider your purchases. Make conscious spending decisions. Think about whether you really need (or want) the item in question. Give yourself a week to think about it. I’ve bought many things that I thought were just great — until I realized half the stuff was ignored after a couple of weeks. Even if it looks like a really good deal, stop and think. You’ll have more money in the bank, and less clutter in your home, if you reduce the amount of stuff that you buy.

4. Distance Yourself from Negative People

Life becomes complicated when you have negative people in your life. While you might not be able to cut some people out altogether, there are some “emotional leeches” that you can slowly distance yourself from. Look for supportive people, and strive to be a supportive person yourself. You will feel more uplifted, and you will feel less of a drain from toxic relationships.

5. Plan Your Meals

It’s amazing how much simpler your life seems when you take time to plan meals. Plan ahead, and make a shopping list. You can plan meals that are simple and fast to make. Consider crock pot meals that require little energy. Slow down and share a meal with your family. Getting back to the simplicity of the kitchen reminds you to relax and enjoy the company of your loved ones. Plus, you’ll spend less money on takeout.

6. Get Automated

When possible, consider automating what you can. Running programs on your heating/cooling system, setting timers on your sprinklers, and setting up automatic bill pay (to go with automatic deposit) are just a few ways that you can reduce stress and simplify your life, since you won’t have to actively do all of these items. Technology has provided us with options to streamline our lives, and in many cases a small amount of set-up work can greatly simplify your life down the road.

Of course, any changes you make will need to stick and that can only come with letting go of some of the habits and thoughts you may have developed over time and making core changes in your lifestyle. But as you do this, you will find that the benefits are well worth it.

Now your turn. Do you struggle to get on top of your life? What have you tried that works and what does not? Let’s hear it.

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6 Ways to Simplify Your Life

Will it Really Cost You $222,360 to Raise Your Child?

Miranda — Thu, 17 Jun 2010 15:39:04 +0000

Savvy money types know that inflation is a reality, and that it is up to them to combat inflation through their investing choices. However, many of us forget that inflation really does enter into every aspect of our lives — including the cost of raising children. The U.S. Department of Agriculture recently released a report assessing the cost of raising a child born in 2009 to the age of 17. As you might expect, those costs have risen since 2008. According the USDA, it will cost you $222,360 to raise your child from birth to age 17.

If you are interested in how much it will cost you to raise your little cherub, the USDA provides a handy calculator to estimate how much your children are costing you each year. You enter information about your child’s age, how many children you have (and their ages), your income, the region in which you live and the number of parents in your household. The calculator then provides a breakdown of estimated yearly costs.

My seven-year-old son should cost a little more than $26,000 a year, according to the USDA. In my case, it would cost another $260,000 to raise my son over the next 10 years — blowing the average out of the water. I’m not sure whether my living in the Western region is skewed by California, or whether assumptions are being made because of my income level (or both), but if it costs that much to raise my son, I’ll be very disappointed in myself.

For fun, I decided to enter in a couple more kids. If I had three kids, each would cost a little more than $16,000 per year. Apparently, your cost per child goes down when you have more of them. Your overall costs to raise your children rise, of course, but the per-child cost is reduced, thanks to hand-me-downs, shared rooms, car pooling and other ways of sharing costs out amongst children.

Saving Money on Raising a Child

Honestly, I don’t think that it should cost nearly a quarter of a million dollars to raise a child. The USDA includes budget categories housing, food, transportation, clothing, health care, child care and education, and the ambiguous “other”. I’ve added up expenses related to my son using my personal finance software (it’s easy, since I have categories for him), and they do not amount to anything approaching $26,000 a year. Some of the ways I’m saving money on raising my son include:

Living in a modest home.
Using meal planning and preparation, and other grocery shopping techniques to save money on food.
Driving inexpensive cars, bought used. We also try to use public transportation when feasible (our local system is pretty bad).
Only buying clothing on sale (preferably clearance).
Using a high deductible plan, combined with a HSA to save on health care costs. Also, we try to live a healthy lifestyle in order to prevent the need for frequent doctor trips. And, luckily, my son is free of chronic and/or genetic conditions.
Reducing my need for childcare by working from home.
Limiting the number of toys, games and material possessions that we have as a family. Also, while my son is involved in some activities, we plan to limit them to two or three.

We also expect that our son will have a job as a teenager, earning money so that he can help pay for some of his activities himself, hopefully teaching him to be responsible with money, while at the same time reducing direct costs to us with regard to raising him.

With some careful planning, it is probably possible to help your child live a good life, and develop good qualities — without spending hundreds of thousands of dollars. Will it cost you $222,360 to raise your child? How are saving money on the cost of raising a child?

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Will it Really Cost You $222,360 to Raise Your Child?

10 Everyday Activities You Can Use to Burn Calories

Miranda — Tue, 08 Jun 2010 04:39:15 +0000

Source: sxc.hu Photo: harrykeely

One of the things I’ve been struggling with is losing 10 pesky pounds that never seem to exactly go away. My personal trainer is encouraging me to find more ways to burn a few extra calories during the day, conceding that it’s really, really hard (especially with summer starting and my son home) for me to find a dedicated 40 minute block of time each to work out. It doesn’t help that, with the notable exception of swimming — which I can’t do each day, I hate exercise. I’m a playing outside sort of person, and I have other interests, so my trainer suggested a few things that I can do each day to burn calories.

After a little tooling around on the Internet, I found a calculator on About.com that helps you determine how many calories are burned with each activity. Most of the calorie counts come from that. It is important to note that these estimates are based on my weight (which I’m not going to share here), and actual calories burned by you depends on your weight, metabolism and other factors.

Take the stairs: This one is obvious, and you’ve heard it several times. But it’s still effective. My trainer says that since I work from home, I should take a few breaks a day, when I rest my eyes from looking at the computer, or get lunch, and take five minutes to go up and down the stairs. For 10 minutes of stair climbing, you can consume 92 calories.
Shopping: This may not be good for your pocketbook, but How Stuff Works points out that you can use up to 243 calories an hour just by pushing a shopping cart around. Try not to get too carried away buying things, and focus on healthy food choices.
Mow the lawn: Get off the riding mower and push the mower around. If you mow for 30 minutes, you can burn 147 calories. You can burn the same amount of calories gardening, while enjoying the fresh air. If you are digging in the garden, you’ll burn even more.
Laundry: Concentrate on what you are doing as you do the laundry, and consider folding clothes standing up. How Stuff Works says that you can burn 72 calories when you fold clothes for 30 minutes, and that ironing can burn off 76.5 calories in half an hour.
Music practice: I was really excited that this was an option. My trainer said that practicing music can be a way to get things going. Playing the piano burns 85 calories in 30 minutes, according to the About.com calculator. Playing my guitar should also burn a few calories.
Housecleaning: Not that I like housecleaning any better than exercise, but apparently it can be a good way to burn a few extra calories: 196 for 30 minutes of vacuuming, scrubbing and other similar chores.
Family game night: My trainer suggests a fun game night with the family. Even a board game can help burn a few calories, since playing cards can burn 159 calories if you play for 90 minutes. You just have to be able to avoid snacks while playing.
Prepare dinner: Take some time to prepare your dinner. Of course, you’ll have to make healthy dinners rather than high calorie dinners, since How Stuff Works points out you’ll only burn 74 calories during 30 minutes of meal prep.
Wash the car: Clean your own car, instead of going to the car wash. You’ll burn close to 277 calories after an hour, and you could save money since you aren’t paying for someone else to do it.
Toss the Frisbee: You can play with your kids and burn calories. Instead of just watch your kids, actually play with them. Frisbee toss can burn 98 calories in 30 minutes. Imagine how much you could burn if you played something even more active with your kids!

Of course, it is important to realize that just doing these activities won’t lead to 10 pounds of weight loss. I still need to exercise 20 to 30 minutes most days. The point of this list is to help me find some more “fun” (or at least bearable) activities that I can do to increase the number of calories I burn in a day, in chunks of as little as five minutes.

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10 Everyday Activities You Can Use to Burn Calories

History of Memorial Day

Miranda — Tue, 01 Jun 2010 16:00:36 +0000

Source: sxc.hu Photo: bluedaisy

May 31, 2010 is Memorial Day in the United States. This is a day when banks are closed and many Americans get a paid holiday. Memorial Day weekend is now a great time for families to get together, travel, fire up the barbecue or maybe just finish up the spring cleaning. Many of us vaguely understand that Memorial Day is meant to honor the dead, but, for the most part, we have forgotten its origins. Indeed, fewer towns and cities each year hold official services and parades in an effort to remember the the valor of our military dead. So, here is a brief overview of Memorial Day:

What is Memorial Day

There is no one place where Memorial Day originated. There are dozens of towns and cities that claim to be the first to celebrate Memorial Day. In the wake of the Civil War, many different towns had services to decorate the graves of the dead, and remember the fallen. A song published in 1867 makes reference to women’s groups in the South who decorated Confederate graves. On May 5 1868, General John Logan of the Grand Army of the Republic issued General Order No. 11, and made an official military declaration for Memorial Day. The first official observance of placing decoration on graves at Arlington National Cemetery (Union and Confederate soldiers) was May 30, 1868.

However, Memorial Day was not recognized as an official holiday by any state until 1873, when the state of New York made a recognition. This might have been one of the reasons that President Lyndon Johnson, in 1966, designated Waterloo, New York as the official “birthplace” of Memorial Day. At any rate, all the Northern states recognized Memorial Day by 1890. Southern states refused to join in, since Memorial Day was originally meant to recognize the Civil War dead. Instead, those in the South held their own memorial services for Confederate dead. After World War I, though, Memorial Day became a day to honor all of those who died in any war, and the South began participating. (Although many Southern states still have additional special days to commemorate Confederate soldiers.)

Wearing Red Poppies on Memorial Day

One of the traditions of Memorial Day that many may not remember is the wearing of red poppies. This tradition started in the 1920s, originally as a way for raise money for war orphans and widows. It was started by a poetess who, inspired by the famous “In Flanders Field” who wrote of “the Poppy red/That grows on fields where valor led…” The VFW has been selling poppies for Memorial Day since then as well. Some of these poppies are paper, and made by disabled veterans. If you are out and about this Memorial Day, I might suggest making sure you have a few dollar bills on your person so that you can buy a poppy or two if a veteran offers to sell you one, as still happens in my little corner of the world.

Memorial Day Observances Today

Many towns no longer even have parades in honor of Memorial Day; for many it is a day to stay home from work and barbeque with the family. Many decorate graves of any dead, forgetting that originally Memorial Day was meant to honor fallen soldiers. However, the military is still quite faithful in its observance. In the late 1950s, the 3rd U.S. Infantry Division began placing miniature American flags at each of the gravesites at Arlington. They do this the Thursday before Memorial Day, and then mount a 24 hour patrol to ensure that none of the flags are removed, or fall over.

Other civic groups, such as the Scouts, place flags in other military cemeteries and offer other services. Many people fly their flags outside their homes on Memorial Day, in order to show their gratitude for the soldiers who have given their lives.

In 2000, Congress passed the National Moment of Remembrance resolution, designed to encourage us to think of our military dead. At 3 p.m. local time, we are encouraged to take a moment to reflect, or to listen to Taps, stopping what we are doing in a conscious effort to remember out honored military dead. So, if you are having a family picnic, watching a ball game, or enjoying your day off in some other way, take a few minutes to stop and remember — and maybe find some way to express your gratitude.

More information, and references for this article

Memorial Day History at www.usmemorialday.org

“Memorial Day” at Wikipedia

Memorial Day History from the Department of Veterans Affairs

“Celebrate Memorial Day” at About.com Homeschooling

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History of Memorial Day

6 Family Relationship Rules You Can Break

Miranda — Mon, 24 May 2010 20:14:25 +0000

Source: sxc.hu Photo: cbcs

We hear a lot about the “rules” of relationships – especially when it comes to marriage and family. If you are married, think back to the advice you got on the day of your nuptials. Chances are you got advice like “don’t go to bed angry” and “don’t let your kids see you fight.” There are also family rules and practices in society that revolve around the idea that children must always come first, or that healthy families do everything together. While some aspects of these rules make sense, they aren’t hard and fast. And they can actually be damaging to family relationships in the long run. Here are 6 family relationship rules that you can break sometimes to build stronger connections:

1. Be Completely Honest All of the Time

There are times that complete honesty is warranted. When you are discussing your financial situation, complete honesty is a good thing. However, you don’t need to be honest about everything all the time. Details about past relationships are not necessary. If there is something you feel the need to disclose, do it quickly, and move on. No need to linger, or to be completely honest about how maybe you liked someone else a little bit better in bed, or admired his or her more adventurous spirit.

2. Make Up Before You Go To Bed

I heard this a lot when I was preparing to marry my husband. And I found early on that maybe staying up until two or three in the morning trying to resolve some issue wasn’t the way to do things. Instead, agreeing that you both need to sleep on it provides some time to step back, and refresh yourselves. You’re both more reasonable when you’re rested, rather than being tired and stressed. Sometimes, after sleeping on it, my husband and I wake in the morning, and realize that what seemed so important the night before was silly and not worth being angry over any more.

3. Never Let Your Kids See You Disagree

Yes, you want to present a mostly united front. But that doesn’t mean that they can’t see how disagreements can be resolved rationally. Showing your children that you can discuss things calmly, without resorting to personal attacks and yelling, sets a positive example for conflict resolution. You can be good examples of compromise and working out relationship differences by showing your children how to disagree constructively. Of course, it means that you and your partner have to have practice at positive outcomes before you demonstrate them to your children.

4. You Should Do Everything Together

We know that quality time with our families is important, but that doesn’t mean that every vacation or activity has to be attended by everyone. Indeed, sometimes it can help for you to go on separate vacations, especially if there are some divergent interests involved. My husband hates camping, but it was part of my growing up, and I love it. So my son and I meet my parents and siblings (and their families) once a year for a camping trip. My son and I have a good time, and my husband gets some buddy time in with friends by going to a movie, or enjoys himself by sleeping in and vegging out with video games and baseball on TV. My husband gets away with one of his cousins regularly, for a road trip of a few days to spend quality time together.

Yes, you need to do family activities for health relationships, but sometimes it can help to have separate activities, so that family members aren’t miserable doing something they really dislike.

5. Your Kids Should Always Come First

Actually, your partner’s emotional needs should come first. This doesn’t mean you neglect your children; just that you show them that your partner is the most important person in your life. Go on dates, leaving the kids with a babysitter, on occasion. One of the most important lessons I learned after having my son is that my husband needed attention, too. After I went back to work when my maternity was up, I would come home and immediately go to my son and pick him up and feed him and hold him. My husband felt I cared more about our son than him. He spoke to me about his feelings, and I realized that our son could wait 10 or 15 minutes while I greeted my husband first, and asked after his day (as a primary caregiver), listening to him.

We also frequently tell our son to wait when he tries to interrupt conversations we are having with each other. We pay attention to our son, and make efforts to encourage him, but we make it clear that we love each other first.

6. You Need Things to Be Exciting

Yes, it’s fun to go on vacations, or to have a red-hot intimate relationship. But it doesn’t need to be that way all the time. Indeed, sometimes it’s healthier to slow down and be boring a lot of the time. The initial excitement you felt upon meeting will eventually wane. That doesn’t mean that you picked the wrong person. Indeed, lifelong commitment with your partner can mean a deeper love, that doesn’t depend on some feeling of excitement. The same is true of family home life. Your kids don’t need to be constantly stimulated with activities and “fun.” There is a lot to be said about finding contentment in home life, and viewing big vacations as “extras” rather than as necessities.

Can you think of other family relationship rules it could be healthy to break?

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6 Family Relationship Rules You Can Break

Finding a Summer Program for Your Budget

Consolidated — Mon, 19 Apr 2010 16:07:47 +0000

Source: sxc.hu Photo: stroinski

Summer is right around the corner, the school year is winding down, and many working parents are looking for summer options for their kids. If you’re like most working parents, your kids are in an after-school program that watches them from the time they get out of school until you get out of work. Many after-school programs have a summer camp program for an additional fee, since they’re going to be watching your child for a longer period.

For example, during the school year, my son’s aftercare program costs $95.00 per week, but during the summer it increases to $165.00 per week. That’s almost a 75% increase in cost, but lunch and daily field trips are included. Some after school summer programs in my area cost less than $165.00, but lunch and field trips are extra. When I did the math, it was cheaper to go with an all-inclusive plan. Also, he had the advantage of already having friends in that program. Make sure when you’re evaluating the after-school summer program, you ask:

What do the additional fees provide?
Is lunch included or does my child need to bring a lunch?
Are there any additional fees for the field trips?
Will my child need spending money on the field trips? Are there any restrictions on spending money?
If we go on vacation for a week or two, will I need to pay anything to hold the slot?

Some after-school summer programs are very flexible and will let you choose what weeks you want to attend. Many parents take advantage of this flexibility by choosing to send their child to a specialized day or overnight camp for a week or two to expand their horizons. When considering a summer camp, you need to: know your child, know the camp and know yourself. Here are some factors to consider when looking at a summer camp:

What sort of experience are you looking for?
How close is the summer camp to home?
Are you comfortable sending your child to an overnight camp?
What’s the size of the camp?
What are the hiring criteria of the staff, and how long have they been there?
Is the camp accredited?
Do you know anyone that’s attended the camp? Or can they provide references?
What does the facility look like?
When do I need to register?
How much is this going to cost?

According to the American Camp Association (ACA), summer camp fees can range from $75.00 to more than $650.00 per week for ACA-accredited resident and day camps. Depending on your budget, some of these summer programs may or may not be within your reach. When you’re pricing out a summer camp, don’t use price alone. Rather than assume that you can’t afford it, make sure to ask questions and get all the facts before making a decision. Ask about special discounts for early registration, full-season or multi-family enrollments. Some camps have special programs that offer financial assistance, scholarships or government assistance to help parents; however, there may be some income restrictions.

With a little planning, you can create a summer program that your child will enjoy but won’t break the budget. Make sure to ask questions, know all your options and select the summer program that best fits your busy lifestyle.

About the Author
Kathryn Katz is a Certified Personal Finance Counselor who works for Consolidated Credit Counseling Services in Ft. Lauderdale, Florida. Their non-profit agency helps families through financial crisis using credit counseling, debt consolidation and financial education.

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Finding a Summer Program for Your Budget

History of April Fools Day

Miranda — Tue, 30 Mar 2010 14:13:26 +0000

Source: sxc.hu Image: florinf

Later this week, on April 1, it is quite possible that you – or someone you know – will play an April Fools’ Day joke. April Fools’ Day (sometimes called All Fools’ Day) is a fun holiday, known for its hijinks. Tricks great and small are played on friends, family and even the world at large. Despite its widespread popularity in Western culture, though, no one truly knows how the holiday came to be. It is important to note that playing tricks on others depends on where you are: In Australia, South Africa and the United Kingdom, jokes are only supposed to be played until noon. In the U.S., Russia, Japan, Ireland, Canada, France, Italy and The Netherlands, jokes can last all day.

Possible Origins for April Fools’ Day

There are a number of theories about why we have April Fools’ Day. One of the most common has to do with the switch to the Gregorian Calendar in 1582. Pope Gregory XIII effected this change, moving the start of the New Year to January 1, instead of April 1. During the Middle Ages, the Feast of Annunciation was celebrated on March 25, and festivities often lasted a full week, ending with the beginning of the New Year on April 1. Those who didn’t get the memo (or were staunch traditionalists) were called “April Fools,” and tricks were played on them, with the practice spreading throughout Europe.

As plausible as this explanation sounds, it may not be the origin of April Fools’ Day. References to “April Fools” have been around since before 1582, and the English didn’t even adopt the Gregorian calendar until 1752 — and April 1 tricks were played in that country before the arrival of the change.

Another explanation is that the change of seasons from winter to spring brings out lightheartedness and a propensity for fun. Hilaria was a Roman festival of rejoicing that took place around March 25, and the Hindu Holi, as well as the Jewish Purim, are happy festivals that take place in the general vicinity of the beginning of April. Other references to April Fools’ Day origins include a misconstrued reference in Canterbury Tales (Chaucer, 1392), “April fish” from a French poet in 1539, and a story from Flemish poet Eduard de Dene about a nobleman who made up up foolish errands for his servant on April 1.

The best “theory” about April Fools’ Day’s origins was itself an April Fools’ Day joke. In 1983, the AP ran a story quoting Joseph Boskin, a history professor at Boston University. He said that April Fools’ Day originated with the emperor Constantine, who allowed a jester to run the empire for one day. While the jester, named Kugel, was emperor, he declared that each year, to commemorate the day he ruled, a day of absurdity should be held. Of course, no such thing ever happened — Boskin was pulling his own April Fools’ Day joke.

Below are some famous pranks on this day:

1957: The BBC runs a program about spaghetti trees. Scores of people contact the BBC, wanting information on growing their own spaghetti trees.
1962: Swedish television explains the physics behind using a nylon stocking to change black and white TV to color TV. Many call the station angry that it didn’t work.
1996: Taco Bell announces that it has bought the Liberty Bell, renaming the “Taco Liberty Bell.” When asked about, the White House press secretary responded that the Lincoln Memorial had also been purchased, and was now the Lincoln Mercury Memorial.
2005: NASA’s official posts a story that there are pictures of water on Mars. When people got to look at the picture, they find an image of a glass of water balanced on top of a Mars candy bar.
2008: CBC Radio reports that Canada would replace it’s $5 coin with a $3 coin called the “threenie”.

There are, of course, countless hoaxes played on April Fools’ Day, some of the small and some quit big. And, of course, you have to be careful of almost anything you read online on April 1.

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History of April Fools Day